A light that never goes

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I would honestly be lying if I were to say life's great and I'm okay because I clearly am not. Sometimes the things life throws at you can really affect you even if you don't want it to, and other times, no matter how hard you try, it just stays there. I guess its been like this for me for so many years I've been able to lose track of the time I've spent trying to make myself feel better. Or pretending that I'm okay by building this wall around me and creating this whole other world that I still live in. So I'm sorry if I can't be this person a lot of you expect me to be. All I can do is leave it to God and pray, and likewise, I'm thankful I have places to go to that make me feel kind of better. I wasn't at the beach but the sound of the waves even from the pier gave me comfort I never thought would have been able to fulfil me. God is good. And likewise, you might think its odd for me to mention this now but I very much wanted today to be such a good one that I wore this outfit out because its one of my recent favourites. The kind that make you feel good throughout? I was having a great time until the day came to a close and I was hit by realities that kind of made me want to fall flat on the floor and cry like a baby. Enough about that though, I'd just like to add I love this jacket to bits. It is lying on my lap now and it kind of makes me feel a teeny bit better just by stroking it in its heavenly goodness. I got it off Nastygal awhile ago and can't wait to think of other ways to wear this once I'm better.
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Meanwhile, I know this space has seen enough of green recently but I was on my way to the Canon service centre today to try to get my camera fixed and I came along this stretch. The weather was so nice and chilly today and this little path way kind of got me…it just looks so serene and calming, plus the weather just made it extra nice to walk through. As for my camera, I couldn't get it fixed because its body is too old and not really worth spending hundreds making it good again. I got to stick with this for now before I really invest in a better body. I'm currently financially unable to upkeep such an expensive hobby and it really wears me down a little. But then again, reading everyone's lovely comments in the giveaway post really makes me feel that doing what I do is so worthwhile and I really just don't mind…

Phtos by Sherman